ONE NIGHT ONLY

Even John Wilkes Booth would kill for one...

I suppose this new blue fat seat could also be considered a "booth" by the so called insecure couples. These are the same ones who turn a rectangular table for two 90 degrees to "create" their own booth for two. Usually only happens in places like Oakridge (or any town with the word "Oak" in it) with guys who have baggie jeans and gold chains. It's sorta like marking their property. It's a whole lot better than him urinating on her before the appetizers arrive.

I guess in this world of LOL, TTYL and ROTF's some of us just want a little PDA.

For when Jared rode the subway instead of eating one

I saw this last night on Chelsea Live and wanted to share it with you. In Brazil they have started to install these new chairs in subway stations for those who are slightly heavier. Not only does the obvious blue color coding target you as a fatty, but I thought white makes you look thinner?

Also, take careful notice of where the seat is bolted to the floor. Yes, right below the fat seat. I call this style of engineering the "see-saw theorem of mass potential".

Ugly people with low self asteem

You know who requests a booth? People who are insecure. The guys that are afraid that if their girlfriend has anything else besides them to look at, they will. LOSERS. Contrastley the people who request a table are either too fat to squeeze into a booth or... want something, anything that could possibly give them a distraction from their date. I know in OUR case we couldn't care less. As long as the establishment serves food and alcohol were fine. Our dates will look like supermodels in the end. OH! and we will fall asleep before any of that matters anyway.

Bitter, party of one

When I open my own restaurant, I'm going to name it "Booths" and every table will be a booth and all we will sell are booths...because apparently that's all people want in a restaurant.

In fact, even the bathroom will be just one long booth with holes cut into them.

Just because it's illegal, doesn't mean it's wrong

I'm sure you're right. Sometimes your mom sat in the back with you.

TFLN to good for me

Turns out Text From Last Night is to good to post my submissions. I thought they were funny. Others thought the were disgusting. You be the judge.......

(412). I just peed into an empty Sobe bottle in the back seat of my car while my girlfriend drove me home with my mom in the passenger seat. Drunk White Trash

(425). I just threw up a little bit in my mouth

(412). YUCK. It's a family affair!

Who doesn't think that's funny? By the way, I had just consumed a few too many drinks at a baseball game. It's not like I did that all the time or sat myself in the back seat everytime three of us went anywhere.

And you thought I was dead...

Sometimes you just need a break, From everything! Back now! not full time but surely part time. to post, insult, rant, complain, and embarrass.